hey whats going on? i hope this week was as good for you as it was for us.  ian found himself with a girlfriend who i must say is not just a pretty face.  along with being quite the looker she is also an accomplished athlete and a girl with a nose for fine cuisine.  i hear she makes a mean fruit salad.  welcome to the family vickie from everyone @ stanx56.

easter is this weekend and i don't know about you, but i'm eggcited! (i kill me) every year most people hunt for eggs, get a spring jacket from their parents, and make their yearly visit to church. this year stanx56 suggests mixing it up a bit.  instead of hunting for eggs in your house, plant them on the street and video tape homeless individuals savaging up the chocolate surprises.  while attending church most people wear a nice shirt and tie, or the Chris Sheridan turtleneck.  We suggest really getting into the easter spirit, but dressing like the easter bunny himself. most party suppliers can hook you up. 

in regards to this weekends elite party, ian is aware that a certain "social circle" is too drunk off their own coolness to invite someone of less cool stature.  he won't get upset, just concerned that they are missing out on the company of a great guy.

here @ stanx 56 we like to address those issues that mean the most to our fans.  so this week, here are some helpful tips.  when a young man starts to notice young ladies, he may be intimidated.  knowing all the right moves is very difficult, especially if you know that your dad happens to subscribe to certain magazines that teach such techniques.  here are some easy steps to getting over such an incident.

Step 1: masturbate more. (it can't hurt)

Step 2: invite lots of hot girls over for no real reason.  you'll parents will think that you grew out of that little white baby dick you used to have.

Step 3: sleep with fairly loud music on, just incase dad is putting the tips to use.

Step 4: don't think anything of the fact that your parents spend a lot of time together in the bathroom.  especially when the showers running.

Step 5: went they hint that you should spent more time at your friend's houses, do it! cause the fact that your home won't stop them.

hope this helps! until next time.

stanx 56 

WEEK 4:

I dont know about you but we cant wait for the Pinch Point show!  An exact date isnt made yet, but theyll let you know on the official web site: http://pinchpoint.tripod.com .   

Make sure you get down to the Dungeon to check them out!

This week is our buddy Browns 17^th birthday!  Some of you might not know this, but Brown Dawg is leaving this summer to Sweden on a student exchange.  For those of us who are graduating next year, this will be Browns last birthday with you!  Make sure its a good one because a guy like this doesnt come along everyday! As a tribute to the man they call simply The Man weve compiled some memories that will make you laugh, cry, and grab your self.

1) The foreign exchange student is someone who is depicted in movies as easy, hot, and open to suggestions.  My whole life I watched these movies and said, Why couldnt that be me? Why dont I ever see those girls? Why?  Then Brown came along and changed all that for me and everyone else.  Brown showed Helga a good ol Canadian time.  Hell never be forgotten for that.  Youre beautiful Brownie!

2) An accomplished athlete Brown played many sports including; hockey, golf, lacrosse, and snow boarding.  Not only was he good, he was tough as nails.  Hes played with a broken arm and many separated shoulders.  Along with many concussions. But his finest moment was forgetting John at the arena after a lacrosse game and forgetting about him for quite some time after. 

3) Brown is the party king! He gave me my first beer and sure hell give me my last.   He makes every time a good time! Here are the official Brown stages of drunkenness:

1. Party Brown: Kind of quiet, just glad to see ya!

2. Loud Brown: Quotes include Beer is good!

3. Professor Brown: Knows everything! Will talk to anyone!

4. Angry Brown: Lasts about 2 minutes

5. I love the world Brown: He loves everything!

Thanks for the memories Brownie, well never forget you.

Big Brown's quote of the week:

    Hello to all stanx56 enthusiasts
A few days ago, Tim asked me if I would be interested in writing an editorial for his site. It seemed like an easy enough task at the time, but as I started to meddle over what I would write about, it became increasingly obviouse that living in Oshawa severly limits the sources for interesting objective writing. It calls for coppius amounts of creative thinking, a skill which I possess in a minute amount. The only viable solution I could find to this dilemma was to write about subjects that entertain everyone,
1. boozing
2. banging
3. the band.

This has been an introduction as to what my column will examine. Next week, we'll start it off with boozing. a)because it is a skill which is required to have fun in our geographical region, b)it will provide us with lengthy debate on our second subject (see list of subjects above) c)it heightens our tolerance for subject 3.

for stanx56.com

Brown

WEEK 5: